Focus on Not Focusing

Ten years is a long time in blog years.  

I have witnessed the community evolve:

-writing anonymously  to 

-writing semi-anonymously to 

-“being out” (if I am allowed to borrow the phrase) as an individual to 

-writing (or not writing) due to corporate clamp down to

-changing writing to only blogging professional topical content to

-blogging with corporate semi-acceptance to 

-blogging being accepted and an expected resume replacement to

-what?

This doesn’t include the changes brought about by social media and the 140 character, SnapChat world.

Today, after a good amount of contemplation and thought, it occurred to me that through this evolution, blogging for me lost what I loved about it.  It went from being a place for me to express who I am and what interests me at a very raw, semi-uncensored level, to believing I needed to make it into something more educational or professional.

As many of my intellectual projects go, it took quite a long time for my subconscious to put all of the pieces together.  It was something that could not be forced.  Looking back, it is now obvious that my blog love is based on exactly me being me.  Some of the pieces included:

–Sean and Mike completely against me changing the name from crzegrl

–While on a flight to Indianapolis, I ran into a dedicated reader who I corresponded with for a time

–During a shift change for the OR, someone saw my full tattoo sleeve and said they were glad a professional had the guts to commit to the art

It is the little things that sometimes need to stew.  Luckily my mind was in a place of peace, or enough so that this became much more simple.

My entire life, thus far, was spent battling the fact that I am a girl who loved to be told she couldn’t do something.  Being a professional, is very much about me being me.  My intensity, my intelligence, my flaws, my choice to be who I am in an open and honest way that most people cannot understand.  If this scares someone away from me, then great.  Come back when you are ready.  If it inspires one person to be more adventurous, open with their heart, or love who they are with an attitude, then my openness is worth every minute.

I will not live a censored life.  

My name is Emily Bennett.  I am 38.  I am a flight nurse, a Michigander, a skydiver, a knitter, a reader of many things, a geek, a masochist, a wife, a step-mom, a sister, a daughter, a friend, a lover, a foodie, a flawed human, a writer . . . and a woman.

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5 Comments

  1. I’m so happy you’re back! I’ve been through the same cycle. I think if you don’t die and keep blogging, it’s inevitable. Great post. I’m adding your feed to Feedly right now and look forward to reading more!

    1. Thanks Megen! Yours is one of the blogs I have followed for a long time and just realized it didn’t get moved to my Feedly account. You are readded! Good to see that there are some of the old players still in the game 🙂

  2. Welcome back Emily! I missed reading your blog. I love knowing how good my former soldiers are doing.
    I am currently the sometimes charge RN in a small but very busy 12 bed ER. Still trying to decide what I want to be when I grow up.

  3. Hi Emily. ^_^

    My name is Rebekah. I’m a technical writer working for a company that creates online training for aviation folks–pilots and the like. I ran into your blog while doing research for our new air medical training and have had to force myself to stop reading it and actually get some work done. I have loved hearing about all your adventures.

    I looked everywhere for your contact information and couldn’t find anything that really worked, and I wanted to ask you if I could interview you, by email or whatever was convenient. You see, I’m working on getting my organization to CAMTS standards for their air medical training and am also trying to make Aviation Regulations and Terminology an interesting subject. I have plenty of information in front of me but the issue is that we don’t know any real live people who are flight nurses or paramedics who can actually tell us if our scenarios are realistic and if we’re covering the information that air medical crews really care about. I would be honored if you’d answer some questions for me and tell me a little about the wonderful things you do.

    Regardless of whether you’re interested or not, thank you for the information your blog has already provided me and for sharing your passions with the world. 🙂 Fly safe.

  4. Just dropped by for the first time in a LONG time, and I’m pleased you are (like me) still plugging along intermittently.
    I’m so angry with current events, and so frustrated my voice seems to be having NO effect at all, it’s difficult sometimes to motivate myself to put fingers to keyboard and type the truth.
    Hope you’re still well and less angry than me.
    Be safe.

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