I spend a lot of time looking in the mirror, wondering who it is I really am.

We identify ourselves by the rank we have earned, the degrees we have attained and the things we have accomplished. Our relationships also define us. It is all about being a brother, sister, or mother to some other person.

When an individual sees themselves outside of categories common to one’s culture they are looked upon as outsiders either to be shunned or admired, circumstances depending.

I am that person.

I have been shunned. I have been admired.

I am myself.

But the question remains. Who am I?

Do I defy definition?

Each time I become frustrated with life I need something to remind me to once again remove myself from those categories. I am not a Nurse Practitioner, an Army Officer, an Aunt, a Sister, a Daughter, a Wife, a Friend. Those are what I am, not who I am.

Dwelling on what I am happens at work, at home, throughout daily life.

When I remember to pull myself back and focus on the who when I gaze into the mirror I am most alive.

I cannot imagine not feeling alive.